Why are you smiling?
Several years ago, my friends and I were riding scooters to Sekumpul Waterfall in Bali. During the journey while stopping at a red light, our front tires touched a crosswalk, which led us to getting pulled over by the police.
The officer took us to a booth on the side of the road, sat us down, and tried us best to make us scared. But my friends and I weren’t threatened, because we were aware about what was happening. It was a shake down. Because his intimating act was for us a show, as he explained how what we did was very wrong, expensive, and time consuming to fix… we all couldn’t help by smile.
Our smiles caused the office to break character; he went from intimating to cheerful, then stopped his script and asked us, “Why are you smiling?!”
We explained we knew what was going on. “How much?” my friend said. The officer pretended to act surprised, but just moments later gave us a price. We negotiated down to 50% of what he suggested, paid the fee, and continued our trip to Sekumpul Waterfall.
I was reminding of this story because while smiling is a natural behavior, the act of smiling has different connotations based on culture. The topic of smiling is especially relevant to me as an American in Russia. In America, we often smile even when we don’t mean it. Americans smile to be nice, hide a negative emotion, or simply because we feel like it’s the thing we must do.
Russians have a different understanding of smiling. Russians smile when they mean it. They will rarely smile at strangers because that’s not a practical thing to do. “Why smile if it’s not sincere?”, they will tell you.
Being in Russia has led to me smiling less. During my recent trip to the US, I’ve had my Russian friends tell me, “Raymond, you look so happy in America. I’ve never seen you smile so much in Penza.”
A few mornings ago as I laid in bed awake at 3am I had an idea. I decided to put a smile on my face for no apparent reason. I had a hypothesis; if I were to smile, my body would react and I would release endorphins in my brain — even if the smile was fake.
My theory was proven true.
Moments after smiling, I felt a jolt of energy burst up my spine into my brain. It was like jumped cables were connected to my heart. It only lasted for a moment, but it made me feel better. The fake smile created a real benefit.
This incident was a sign to smile more. Not just in a fake way, but naturally. From watching one of my favorite comedians, Norm Macdonald, to finding clever and funny ways to contribute to conversations, I’ve been trying to add more humor into my life.
No matter what’s going on in your life, I encourage you to smile more often. From watching a comedy to doing more of whatever makes you happy, smiling is one of the most-natural ways to make yourself feel better.